I can't believe it. I can't believe we not only pulled it off and buried the evidence... but I can't believe Dawson and I are finally on the road to becoming friends again... burying the past, so to speak (or in this case type).
First that prank was hysterical. The Principal's boat in the Capeside High swimming pool! I bet when the Board of Ed. was approving a pool they never anticipated it being part of the BEST SENIOR PRANK EVER!
Man. Dawson and I have been planning to do a senior prank of monumental proportions since we saw Gretchen and her friends attempt to pull one off. Of course, they got busted when a not-yet-a-Deputy Doug caught wind of it. Gretchen, being a Witter has the ability to talk her way out of any situation (even to another Witter) and was able to bribe Doug with a steady supply of Dunkin' Donuts.
Second, Dawson. I don't know. A "reunion" has been a long time coming but it's not as if bonding over one prank is going to undo the damage we've inflicted on each other. But it's a start, right? At least that's what Joey said. I'd be the last person to admit how much I miss our friendship, but... I miss our friendship.
Man, it's been a long time since I was in Dawson's room. I didn't even recognize it. It's so de-Spielberg-ized. There was pictures of Jack, Jen and Andie everywhere... but none of me and Joey. I guess it's good to have things semi-back to normal - whatever normal was.
I miss Andie. I haven't really expressed that to anyone, including Joey, but I can't write it here. I miss her. It doesn't seem right that she's gone. I miss the way she said "Pacey," I miss that eternal optimism... that ability to always see the bright side even at the darkest times. Missing Andie doesn't make me love Joey any less... it a way loving Joey makes me miss Andie more. I can't help but wonder how she is out there, alone. I guess I feel guilty for being so happy and knowing that there is something inside Andie that wasn't happy, no matter how hard she tried to smile through it all.
At the time our breakup seemed like it was about Marc (Mark? - who cares) but looking back I realize it was about so much more. It was about me thinking, trying too hard to be this person who was worthy of her love, trying to be the person she wanted me to be. I guess by the time I realized that who I WAS enough for her, I was starting to fall in love with someone else. Joey.
It's hard to think I could have fallen "out of love" with Andie. I mean, there's a part of my heart that will always be hers but now my heart (not to sound completely cheesy and Dawson-y) belongs to Jo. I guess the scary thing is what if she falls out of love with me?
Sometimes I can't believe how lucky I've been in my life. I've had two (well three if you count Tamara, uh... Ms. Jacobs) of the most beautiful women in the world actually love me ofr who I am, screw-ups and all. The Witters are known for their bad luck, especially in love (i.e. Kerry, Doug, Gretchen) but somehow I've managed to become the luckiest guy in the world.
I still miss Andie though. I hope she comes back to visit occasionally. I told her the night we said goodbye that someday she owes me another dance under the twinkle lights. That remains one of my best memories.
So the glory of the prank is wearing off a little because the homework is piling up. Retaking three classes in addition to all my other ones is no easy task. It seems that the only one less concerned than me about "next year" is Jen. Her college application prognosis seems as grim as mine. Unlike me, however, Jen actually could get into plenty of schools. For all I know she's pulled an Andie and already gotten in somewhere and just not said anything for fear we'll all know how brillant she really is. Who knows? Then there's Joey. I think she just filled out a Stanford application. Stanford? And Dawson has applied to numerous West Coast schools. And Joey and Dawson both on the West Coast...I don't even want to think about that.
Why can't we all go to Capeside Community College? We could hang out at the Peach Pit after dark and all move into the Leery's house when they conveniently move to Japan or some equally contrived location. Now what happened - I can't remember. I stopped watching 90210 back in 1997 for some reason... did Brandon or Dylan end up marrying Kelly?
It seems like "the future" is the only thing on everyone's mind. College, college, college. What about the present? That was the great thing about being on the boat this summer. It was all about "the now". I like the "the now". "The now" is great -- I have everything a high school senior could want (sans a stellar academic record) - a beach house, a girlfriend, occassional access to the Wittermobile... Life is good. I wish it could just stay like this.
So Joey really wants me to go to this Worthington thing with her. Surprise, surprise, more college stuff. She got Saturday night off form work so she could be a "partier" at the Yacht Club, not a waitress. Of course I'm going to go but to be honest, I don't want to. Seeing Joey mingle with Cape Cod elite is not the way I want to spend Saturday night. Unless of course she's making fun of them with me, not being a part of it. Part of me doesn't know why it's so important to her that I go, but that same part of me is really glad it is so important to her. This isn't like that recommendation thing. That time she asked Dawson...this time she asked me. And even though I will give her a hard time about going, there's no place I'd rather be than by Joey's side. I just hope no matter what happens, she'll stay by mine.
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